?

Log in



You Are An INFJ



The Protector



You live your life with integrity, originality, vision, and creativity.

Independent and stubborn, you rarely stray from your vision - no matter what it is.

You are an excellent listener with almost infinite patience.

You have complex feelings, and you take great care to express them.



In love, you see relationships as an opportunity to connect and grow.

You enjoy relationships when they are improving and changing. You can't stand stagnation.



At work, you stay motivated and happy... as long as you are working toward a dream you support.

You would make a great photographer, alternative medicine guru, or teacher.



How you see yourself: Hardworking, ethical, and helpful



When other people don't get you, they see you as: Manipulative, weak, and unstable


ontd_creepy What are you afraid of? meme

1.) Would you say that you are easily scared? List your fear level on a scale from 1 to 10, with 10 being a MAJOR scaredy cat!
Umm.. probably about a 4 or 5 depending. Media doesn't scare me too much but I'm a super paranoid mofo when it comes to real situations.

2.) What are the three things that scare you the most?
Crazy people and by that I mean those folks you've seen or heard about that just <i>snap</i> one day.
Car accidents- I used to have nightmares about them.
Loosing my loved ones.

3.) Have you ever seen a ghost? And if so, were you frightened?
Not really... I had one very minor ghost thing that I want to believe but it's still filled in my "not proof" file. I'd love to see one though. Until then I remain a skeptic.

4.) What are the top 3 scariest movies that you have ever seen?
Poltergiest
Final Destination
The Ring (but only the first time I watched it)
The Shining (since The Ring doesn't really count lol)

5.) What are the top 3 scariest books that you have ever read?

Haunted
Desperation
Kiss Me Like You Love Me (it didn't *scare* me, but I felt super uneasy while reading it)

6.) Out of the following, which one do you think has the highest scare factor: Dracula, Frankenstein's Monster, The Wolfman, The Mummy or none of them?
Ummm... I guess The Mummy but I've never really been into any of these guys.

7.) Which one of the following acts of Nature scare you the most: Tornados, Hurricanes, Volcanoes, Earthquakes, Lightning Storms, Blizzards...?
Tornadoes even though I think they're incredible to watch (on tv!). Hurricanes can be scary especially since I live on the coast in the southeast but we're in a little pocket that makes them avoid us most of the time. I love lightning storms as long as I'm indoors or under shelter.

8.) Lots Of Gore - or - Subtle, Psychological Scares? Which is the *bigger* scare for you?
Gore scares me more during the scene but subtle and psychological scares stay with me longer. They're harder to turn off.

9.) What do you think is the scariest way to die?
Anything but in my sleep really. haha

10.) Would you ever spend the entire night - by yourself - in a house that was reported to be "authentically" haunted?
Yeah probably as long as reports of the entity were harmless.

11.) Do you get scared when you visit staged Haunted Houses - that you pay admission for?
Yeah but it's just a "boo" scare and the antici.....pation spooks me a little.

12.) Do you *enjoy* getting the boo-boo-gee-bees scared out of you?
Sometimes. :)

13.) Which scares you more: a really scary book - or - a really scary movie?
Movies.

14.) Does the thought of aliens scare you? Have you ever had a close encounter?
YES. I used to be really scared of them. No encounters but I'd like to see something in the sky I can't explain.

15.) Are you afraid of bugs? If so, what is the bug that absolutely creeps you out the most?
Kind of... if I know the bug is there and it's not too close to me I'm fine. (I have a spider camping out near my window at work and I love watching him.) Bug swarms are scary.... I don't like hive mentality. *heebiejeebie*

16.) If you had a choice, and you HAD to pick one of the following; would you rather be: a.) Eaten alive, b.) Burned alive or c.) Buried alive?
D: None of those if I can help it! Definitely not burned alive, I honestly don't know between the other 2.

17.) What is the grossest, scariest thing you have ever eaten (or drank)?
EASY: Jones Soda Holiday pack that had turkey and gravy, cranberry, brussel sprouts, pumpkin pie, and stuffing. We tasted each flavor and they were all horrifying. The "best" was the cranberry, the worst either the sprouts or the pie.

18.) Have you ever visited a graveyard at night? And if so, have you ever laid down upon one of the graves?
Nope.

19.) Do Ouija boards scare you?
They're creepy but I don't believe in them so not really to me.

20.) Abandoned Haunted House - or - Abandoned Insane Asylum... which one is scarier?
Asylum! Some pretty awful stuff went on in those things. :(

21.) Do you enjoy scaring others?
YES I kind of hope I can be a ghost when I die so I can scare people. If I had telepathy this is the only thing I'd use it for beyond just being lazy. haha I only scare people that I know will be ok with it and not genuinely upset though.

22.) What is the best scary prank you have pulled on someone?
I managed to get a hold of a friend's day planner once and wrote cryptic messages in it referring to her doing something that she shouldn't have been doing. Not that great of a story but it was funny when it happened.

23.) Have you ever seen an actual dead body; firsthand - and not including at funerals?
When my husband's grandfather passed away in hospice we were in the room with him for a little while before the funeral service came for him.

24.) Is there any music that creeps you out? If so, what is it?
I can't think of any.

25.) Is there any piece of art that creeps you out? If so, what is it?

I find this one disturbing. :<

26.) What creature do you think is the scariest of all? (No make-believe creatures please).
I don't know... people are pretty scary. Oooo... and this thing.

27.) Do you think that you could ever stand by and watch a mortician prepare a body for burial without getting scared, creeped out or physically sick?
Yeah.

28.) Do you have many nightmares? If so, what would you say is your worst one?
Not too often; my worst was when I dreamed about my husband and I getting into a car accident. I also used to have a recurring nightmare where I was in this big white room and there was a booming voice talking to me but I couldn't understand it. Not that scary but I guess I thought it "meant" something because I kept having it for a few years.

29.) Do dolls, puppets or clowns scare you?
I think they're creepy but I'm not really scared of them. I kind of like clowns and puppets tbh.

30.) And finally.... what is the best scary story of something that has happened to you?
I was walking to the little corner store one afternoon when I was like 13 or so. There was a guy in front of the store straddling his bike. I didn't think too much of it but he was watching me so I just kind of regarded it and moved on. When I left I noticed he was gone so I felt a little better. I looked back at the store and he had <i>hidden behind the building and started riding his bike toward me when I saw him</i>.

nope.jpg

Ran home and locked my doors.

Ghost walk!

A few weeks ago when Goat and Dusk were visiting we headed downtown for a ghost walk! I took a lot of pictures but while my phone has a decent camera, most of them didn't really turn out too well...Pics...Collapse )
Me: "So then would you hate me if I was gay?"
Dad: "Well I wouldn't *hate* you."

Happy Independence Day everybody!

Rainbow Dash birthday cake!



Made with real rainbows!


AND REAL RAINBOW DASH!

Ugh.


http://www.godhatesfags.com/fliers/20110428_Savannah-GA-Schools.pdf

As much as I hate the thought of those people coming here, if I was able I'd love to go there just to see the signs people bring to protest THEM.

Apr. 19th, 2011

I forgot to mention that we also took our cats to the vet for shots, flea treatment, and deworming this weekend. One of them is overweight and one is getting there; one is perfect. We knew he was and had bought the Science Diet weight loss stuff and when we moved into the house he became much more active since he had more space. We could tell he was loosing but then he started gaining again. He's fat. Like, reeeeaaally fat. Dangerous fat actually. We've been feeding him too much of the diet food. So we've overhauled their eating routine and have an actual measuring cup so we can keep up with everything. They hate the new routine and hate us for it. :( They're restless, and jittery; bouncing off the walls one minute and hiding under the bed for an hour the next. I hate it for them but as soon as we get them to the proper weight we can give them the "maintenence" amount rather than the "wieght loss" amount. They also hate that we started putting thier bowls in separtate rooms other than the kitchen. Anyway, they'll get used to it after awhile. And they'll be healthier for it.

I'm going to be applying for an ER tech position tonight. It's only part-time, so it's not preferred, but I'm worried I'm going to start forgetting stuff. I need to start working. At the very least it'll get my foot in the door. My goal is still to get on the truck but while I can tell a difference with what I've been doing physically, I'm still not strong enough to pass that physical. I'm going to start going back to my cousin's station again to specifically work on lifting stretchers, dragging hoses, and slinging the sledge hammers, but in the meantime I'm going to focus on getting this ER tech gig. He said it's a great hospital to work for. Plus at some point I'd really like to get on with Effingham hospital (woot! 10 minute ride to work!) and this hospital would be a great place to start.  

I'm off on Friday and couldn't be happier about it. <3


Weekend wrap up.

It was a pretty busy one this weekend, yet I don't really feel like I got anything done. :( First we grilled for the first time on the new grill Friday night. I made BBQ kabobs with tofu, onion, peppers, and mushrooms plus we did little potatoes and corn on the cob. Panda ate steak; with my recent consideration over whether or not I may start eating seafood again, out of complete curiousity I stuck my face near his plate and took a big wiff of his steak. Not interested. At ALL. Blech! D:

Saturday he grilled some chicken and I put my leftovers in a foil pack and grilled that. We ate really delicious rice with it (saute the dry grains with garlic, herbs, and butter on medium heat then add your liquid and cook like normal- SO GOOD). We started watching a movie and kept pausing it since the Dish Net guy showed up to install our satellite. We're so excited to have tv again! It took a long time since the box he brought first was not working. When it was finally done I said that as excited I was that we had TV again, I'd kind of like to finish the movie we were watching of Netflix and wouldn't you know it? Not only did we find it on Showtime, it was in the exact place we left off. B)

More grilling for dinner and we headed to my mom and dad's to ride with them into Savannah to see my cousin's band play. They did a good job but the tiny dirty bar venue late at night isn't really our thing. We stayed for a few sets and went home. I slept in really late and wasn't feeling well. By the time I got out of bed Panda had already mowed the lawn. It looks great! It's the first time we've mowed since we've been here. He did a great job. :)

Pizza for lunch and then, I don't know. The day just sort of got away from me. I know we watched a movie and I took a short nap but I don't really know what else and I never even turned my computer on. We grilled again for dinner. I drew a little bit but nothing to completion and nothing for the Iron Artist.

Today I've been kind of kicking myself around, I feel really unaccomplished over the weekend and it's led me to feeling bitter about career stuff both animation stuff and EMS stuff. I feel like I can't get anything to work for me and it's my fault. :( It's like I'm scared to succeed at something. It's got me antsy, anxious, and depressed this morning and mad at myself. I've just got to hunker down and get this done. I'm tired of feeling inept and sorry for myself.


art stuff and jogging

Been playing around with some ATCs and enjoying that. they're fun and little and easy to get along with. :) My first variety pack I'm themeing around fruit. It's being quite entertaining to design and each one I've made has led me to thinking about other little designs.

I finally found some freaking white gel pens!! I've been looking everywhere for them and had finally figured I was going to have to head downtown to the art stores that cater to SCAD students but they were hiding in the scrapbooking section at Michael's. I also got  some pretty cardstock to make some bages on. I've been interested in making them before and they turned out ok, but I never finished them. Now that I've been working out my traditional media muscles I'm ready to try again.

I'm also going to be working on some designs for a zazzle store. Not that I'm money-grubby or anything, but since art never panned out to be my career like I'd planned it would at least be nice to maybe keep doing it as a little side job on top of doing it for fun and entertainment. I know I can make it happen, I just need to work the rust off.

I went jogging yesterday and I can honestly say it's the first time I've ever been excited to work out again the next day. I went farther than ever and could have done even better except that I didn't hydrate well yesterday. I went just under a half a mile without stopping which while not terribly impressive by others' standards is a personal best for me. I found when I slowed to a walk to catch my breath I wasn't sweating like I should have been and my neck and arms were clammy. I know I could have run the other half but decided it wasn't safe to. I've been drinking a lot more water today and I'm ready to get home and try again!


We had a great housewarming party. :) Well, after I spent nearly an hour digging glass out of my foot. (Stepped on a rogue shard in the kitchen; we have no clue where it came from). Mom and Paula arrived around 1:00 to set up. It was a little hectic since I had planned to be done with my preparations before they got there but I had the issue with my foot. I ended up making about a dozen rolls of sushi (96 pcs- veggie, cucumber, and tuna- half regular and half spicy) and a little over a dozen pieces of onigiri. Paula and Mom brought wings, meatballs, fruit trays, veggie trays, yummy yummy punch, shrimp, chips and dip, peanuts, cheesecake, and wow I'm probably forgetting something. It was a really nice spread and everyone enjoyed it!

We recieved some lovely gifts which I will have me busy with thank you letters! We got a shower curtain for the  guest bath (just in time for guests in a few weekends), some little cute solar lights to line the driveway with, a welcome mat with an owl :3, a couch cover since it'll be awhile before we can afford to replace the furniture, a nice spice rack, several very useful gift cards, and Mom and Dad got us a grill! :D So excited! We used to grill out all the time when we had one in the rental house but then we had to get rid of it when we moved to the apartment. We'll need to use some of the gift cards for a lawnmower. Not what I'd like to spend them on but we can't go much longer without one. The lawn's looking pretty shaggy. ETA: Oh yeah! I forgot! Remember the outdoor thermometer we had and someone stole the little reciever? Panda's dad got us a new one! haha We've got the little box hidden this time. :3

In addition to the whirwind of cleaning, cooking, party, eating, more cleaning, etc. I was mulling some things over that have been bothering me lately. I've been having some a bit of a food identity crisis and another personal issue and I sort of feel like I've identified some things I need to address personally. Panda and I talked about them for a little while and he's always so understanding. <3 I've got some consideration to take on one and action on the other. I feel good about it.


I guess I am pretty high strung when my mom calls just to make sure I'm ok because she's worried about me. :/  I'd made a couple of emo-like/ranty fb posts over the past few days and she thought I sounded off on the phone. I hadn't really noticed the theme I suppose. :( I'm going to really try not to stress so much.

This week man. :( It's been pretty turbulent. I'm really stressed; I keep getting little boughts of moodiness and trying to yank myself out of it; we've still got a little bit of house cleaning today before the housewarming party. I'll have some touch up and spot cleaning to do Saturday morning plus making a bunch of food. Panda's working Saturday for a bit so he won't be able to help me. At least he'll be home a little after lunch today and he can get some things done.

I've gone about a week now with that gastro thing seemingly cleared up but it's back today. Panda's saying I just need to go to the doctor but I don't have time today. I'll give it the weekend and if there's still problems I'll go first thing Monday.

I've gotten 3 of my IA pieces totally finished, one not even started as I'm having a hard time with the shape of the character's head and one will not be done for about another week. I definitley won't be able to do anymore oil pieces for this. :/ It's taking much longer than I thought it would to dry; I knew oil took awhile but since I've never worked in it before I wasn't really sure exactly how long. Now, having said that, the piece is looking really good so far! :D

I'm getting panicky feeling since I've thought of a few pieces I'd really like to sit down and work on but I don't have time right now. I enjoy doing anthro art but I'd like to do more artsy art too and Panda wants some fan art which I'm happy to oblige for him. I've bought this little pack of misc. ATC materials (bristol, water color, ilust. board) that comes 12 to the pack. In the same way I'm doing the themed IA catagories, I'd like to theme each pack as something. So I'll have 12 ATCs themed around, say, fruit. Since there's different kinds of working surfaces I'll work in different mediums and hopefully push myself a little artistically. Plus they're small enough that I won't put a ton of time in each one.

I did start jogging again this week. :D I'm happy to report that I didn't notice any disentigration in my ability after last week's lazy-fest. I actually went a bit farther a little easier. If the little bit of cold in the air hadn't been there I think I could have gone even farther still but my lungs were aching.

I had a bugger of a time getting to sleep last night so I'm letting this stuff get to me too much. I feel really high strung right now. :( I'm going to try to chill myself out today. haha


uhn...;_; I feel terrible. I haven't done any exercising in like a week. I just haven't found the motivation to go at all.     :( We've got the housewarming party this weekend so we cleaned and finished unpacking (totally done now!), I've been scrambling trying to get some art stuff done (decided to use oil paint for one but I've never used it before and didn't realize it takes nearly a month for it to dry so I know that piece is going to be late), we've still got a little bit of cleaning to do that we'd wanted to put off until later this week, and we've got to get to the grocery store. :( I don't know how I'm going to find the time but I've got to work it in there. My new job and getting out of this place hinges on my fitness. I know that and it's still hard to get up and do it. ;_; I'm starting to get pretty bummed and I'm feeling pretty down on myself about it.

I had awful nightmares last night; and I never have nightmares; super weird dreams yeah, but never nightmares. The first one I remember was having ants crawling under my skin and I was picking them out with tweezers and a straight pin. Then I found some strange plastic under my skin and Panda told me that we couldn't call the police or anything because the government could have put it there and they'd found out we removed it and they might kill me. (lolwat) I tried to leave in my car but I thought it was sabataged and it was; I wrecked but was ok and when I crawled out there were strange people all around me. (I'd like to thank X-Files for all that...) I woke up and we were having a super bad thunderstorm that startled me pretty good. It was bright and loud and several of the crashes shook the house. When I fell back to sleep I had a dream about us going to a con and running into our ex-friends and they were being... well, themselves. I honestly don't know which dream was worse. One scared me and one made me angry. In my sleep. I was more tired when I woke up this morning than when I went to bed last night.

At a point on Sunday we headed over to Lowe's where a friend of mine works. She was my best friend in high school and she ended up moving to PA with a guy. We sort of stayed in touch at first but then just kind of stopped. She moved back here... man, I think it was close to 2 years ago and we just never really got together. We'd call and talk and always ended with the "Hey! Let's get together sometime!" but never did. It was amazing seeing her! We were at Lowe's for like 2 hours haha. She's definitley going to be coming over next week and she may stop by this Friday if we get the housewarming bid-ness done in time. :D

We came home from Lowe's with a lime tree and a tangerine tree! I'm so excited! It'll be awhile before they produce anything of course but they're so cute right now. :) We've got them planted so that when they're bigger they'll block the side of the house from the sun. Also, while digging, either we disturbed an ant bed or one of us layed the shovel down in one; I was digging and started feeling the bites, looked down and saw a good 30-50 ants on my arms. D: (I'm sure that's where the ant dream came from) I only got bitten about 6 times luckily.

Anyway I've got to seriously step up my game with a lot of things right now. I'm starting to feel a little overwhelmed but, this too shall pass.

Home!

We had a really nice trip to Atlanta! We had a rocky start; Panda got pulled over for speeding and an expired tag before we even made it to the interstate. :/ We just went ahead and turned around and got the tag taken care of before continuing. I got really sick... I'm not sure if it's still that same gastro issue I've been having or, I sort of think one of the eggs I ate before we left may have been juuuust a little too ripe. I almost felt like I did when I had food poisoning (fullness, bloating, nausea) but without as many trips to the bathroom. I was actually worried about being able to sit through the event because I felt so awful but I got myself feeling better with a cocktail of Pepto(nausea), Alka Seltzer (fullness), and Gas X(bloating). I figured one of those would take care of it but since no one of them fixed the several issues I was having I just went full force on it. In retrospect that was probably overkill but hey, I fixed it.

We killed a little bit of time before the show by going to the Cumberland Mall which was a little bit of a let down (we were thinking it was a really super large mall we'd been to in Atlanta before) and we found a Best Buy that had a 3DS on display!! I hadn't seen one yet and I've been antsy to get a hands on look at one! I LOVED it! :D Panda couldn't see the 3D, he said it just looked like 2 images and made his eyes feel weird, but it worked great for me! I had already thought I wanted one and now I know I do! I'm going to wait for some more games to come out though as it's a little limited right now but I'm excited to get my hands on one. Glad I never updated my fat to the XL like I had considered last summer...

The movie was fantastic. When Red State releases, go see it. I loved it. I sort of knew what it was going to be about but didn't realize that it was so specifically based on the Westboro crazies. I enjoyed it way more than I thought I would and it's almost ridiculous how excited I am to watch it again.  Kevin Smith was just as entertaining as he is on any of the Q&A dvds. He had an amazingly entertaining story to tell about Shirley Phelps before the movie started about a reaction she had to a protest sign a Westboro-protester-protester (heh) had that said "DICKS TASTE YUMMY". He saw her shake her head at it. Later when they (Westboro) took up his offer to come and watch the movie he asked her in front of the crowd if she shook her head because she didn't like what the sign said or if it was because she disagreed. Worded in his own colorful fashion of course. It was a great intro.

We stayed in a pretty cheap motel but it wasn't the worst hotel we've ever stayed in. I slept ok but woke up several times. I couldn't get warm enough. :( We ate lunch at this great place called the Big Chow Grill. You get a bowl and fill it with either rice or noodles, then move down a buffet of toppings, seasoning, and sauces, then get a small bowl for protein and they stir fry it up for you. I got lo mein noodles, carrots, mushroom, peppers, tofu, broccoli, and onion, then sweet and sour sauce, 5 spice, and ginger sesame tofu (which their menu called tempeh for some reason; not the same thing at all). It was delicious. I really wish we had one in Savannah! Obviously at this point my tummy was fine. :P

We headed over to Fernbank to see the Mythical Creatures exhibit which we enjoyed. Not much else had changed since we'd been there last but we did go through the other exhibits again. Headed home and made pretty good time once we got out of Atlanta traffic. It was a really nice trip. I'm sure my boss is going to be a bitch tomorrow as is customary for her whenever I take a day off but at least it's Thursday and the weekend is almost here! She'll cool off after a day or two. I'm excited to sleep in our own bed tonight.

Mar. 28th, 2011

Weekend was ok. We didn't go see my cousin's band since I wasn't feeling well but in any case I thought this was going to be a big family get together and it wasn't. We're not really bar-hoppers so we'd have felt weird in a smoky bar not knowing anyone.

We got most of the house cleaned. Especially of note is that we got the CLOSET PUT UP!! :D Since we moved we've been living out out a small selection of clothing that was never hung up. heh I gutted the piles and suitcases out and hung everything up and put everything away! Yay! Also all of our laundry was caught up and put away/hung up. the bedroom still needs some straightening up from the move; there's still a few unpacked rouge boxes and bags. Next mission should we choose to accept it: the craft/book room. It's really important to get this one organized since when we get ready to have a baby it'll be the baby's room so the more organized it is for another shift to another room the better. Plus when we have folks over, if that ever happens anyway, we'll put them in there on an air matress. Once we get new furniture we'll get a couch with a fold out in it. We've only got one more weekend to really scrub everything down before the housewarming so we'll stay busy next weekend.

Got my next batch of IA people. I don't have too many ideas for this theme but I'll have a 4 hour car ride tomorrow and Wednesday to think about it. We're off to Atlanta for Kevin Smith's Red State tour. :) I'm pretty excited about it! I think we've decided to go to Fernbank on Wed. The Sweetwater Brewery doesn't start tours until 5:30pm and as much as Panda wanted to go we can't stay that late. I don't know what we'll do on Tuesday, there's a large mall right near the art center and our hotel so we may just poke around there. Not sure...

We had a nasty hail storm yesterday. The cats flipped and I was worried about windows and the garden. We were getting golf-ball sized hail and the wind was kicking it. After the hail the wind stayed but we got a massive downpour.  No damage as far as we can tell though it'll be a few days before I'll know if any of my plants got it too hard. Hopefully they're all ok.

My realmailxchange piece is almost done. I totally scrapped what I was working on and just did something else entirely. I'm liking this much better anyway. :) Since we're packing tonight, gone tomorrow and most of Wed, and it's due the31st, I'll be turning it in in just the nick of time. :o

 

Mar. 24th, 2011

I pushed myself entirely too hard during Monday's workout. I guess the whole trying to fight tears while doing wall squats should have tipped me off... I was pretty sore on Tuesday, but yesterday was an absolute nightmare. I couldn't even walk normally. :< I'm better today (still sore but not agonizingly so) so I'll get in a really good jog. I finally bought a scale. I'm at 147 which is slightly better than where I thought I was. I'm shooting for trimming and muscle gain so I guess 130 is a good goal? I'm 5'4'' and don't want to get "skinny" so I would think 130-135 is probably good. When I ws close to 120 a few years ago I was kind of thin, but still flabby and in a junior size 7 and not happy with how I looked. I would think a trim and muscular 130 would look better than a flabby 120.

I've got a crap-ton of stuff to get done this weekend. 2 more IA pieces (one is at about 90% completion, one at about 30% but it'll get done much faster) and the realmailxchange piece which I started last night, found I'd made it too small and restarted again. X3 We've got house cleaning and unpacking to get done, and we're going to see my cousin's band play Saturday night.

When I woke up this morning I thought it was Wednesday. When Panda corrected me, at first I was all YAY IT'S ALMOST THE WEEKEND but then I remembered how much stuff I've got to do. haha

Also; I'm suddenly obsessed with Freakazoid!.

Mar. 21st, 2011

I was off and on sick all weekend with some kind of stomach grossness. I never threw up, but I  kept getting sudden boughts of nausea and I spent some time in the bathroom... ;_; I don't know what was going on but I seem to be better now. (Nope. Still sick. Starting to think about the doctor actually...) I didn't work out much this weekend because of it; I did get some work done in the yard if that can sort of count. Good news is I'm in my skinny pants again! Last I tried them I couldn't pull them up but now I can get them on and they're comfy. :) They still don't look quite right, (muffintop lol) but they will very soon. Planning on taking my measurements tonight to compare with the last ones.

Panda had to work Saturday morning from 4am to 12. He stopped and got us some lunch and took a nap for a few hours. I doodled out on the porch and came up with a few ideas I'm happy with; I just need to hash some designs out. :) I've got 2 more IA for this week; one is really close to done (the only traditional piece this time) and the other I'm scrapping what I had for something I like better. I've really got to finish my realmailxchange piece this week... >_> Once I pull out the sewing machine I'll finish it- it's just that "getting started" thing that trips me up sometimes.

He's all excited because he got the Homebrew channel working on the Wii. All the NES, SNES, N64, and Genises games we want to play at the drop of a hat. He's very happy. We had been going through and playing some of the games featured on AVGN including that god-awful Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde game. lol They were good for some laughs. :)

We went into town on Sunday to get some things for the housewarming taken care of and we're going to go ahead and join up at the Y since they don't have a "contract" persay. You can quit at anytime. The sign on fee is $100 though so once we can fork that out we'll get started. (Right after Atlanta next week) Also we watched Martyrs last night. It wasn't a great movie, but it was interesting and we got to talking about it a lot. It was sort of eff'ed up but in a good way... The more I think about it the more conclusions we could come up with about the ending.

I'm back to feeling a little depressed again. Not much but since I don't know why or what's bothering it's frustrating. I suppose it's my job and the waiting and trying for something better but I don't know. I'm trying to shake myself out of it.
Lookit my new icon! :D I lurve it!

I got TONS done today! I was off for St. Patty's and I had a good day. :)

I ate a poached egg on a bagel for breakfast, a big giant delicious salad with vegan ranch dressing (I know! I didn't know it existed either!) for lunch, worked in the garden, and sat out on the porch with the cats drinking margaritas and worked on my Iron Artist stuff. :3

Maaaaaan.... screw work. I want to stay home. lol

I got 2 IA pieces totally finished, one very near finished, and 2 got the lines done. Yay! I'm so excited for this batch! I can't wait for the recipients to see them. :D

I have been a HUGE grouch bucket since Monday, (got mad at my cousin, Panda and I got into it a little, and I started getting a little depressed feeling again) so the good day was very much appreciated. <3 I feel totally renewed and invigorated.

Mar. 15th, 2011

Sooo.... I didn't really get to do everything I wanted to do this weekend. :( That includes gym shopping. We just ran out of time. We had to get some things ready for the housewarming party and I guess since it's getting warm everyone and their mama was out on Saturday. We'd planned on only being in town for a few hours and we didn't get home until about 6 or 7. I wasn't feeling well, I was not quite nauseas, I guess queasy is more like it, and I had a dull throbbing headache. I still wasn't feeling well Sunday but I got out in the yard and prepared the other garden bed and got the seedlings down. I'm going to the station tonight again for training and I'll push myself pretty good to make up for it. I guess I'll just call around and get some monthly pricing info.

I'm loving this Iron Artist thing! It's really getting my creative juices flowing! I realized it had been awhile since I'd done any personal art so I was just sort of farting around on a doodle page in PS and now I've got something I can't WAIT to finish! As a matter of fact I've already asked Panda if he'd do a piece of music for it. :D I've got really solid ideas for all the characters in my new IA slots. I've been toying with sketches and I'll start on them seriously tonight. I'm off on Thrursday and I need to finish my piece for  realmailxchange. I should have finished it before I started on the IA buuuut... I didn't. :I Anyway it won't take too long, I just need to finish it then I can spend the rest of the day putting in a good dent in the IA stuff.

Some girly TMI behind the cut...Collapse )
 


Mar. 10th, 2011

I started my training at the station last night with my cousin. He had me doing very similar exercises to what I'll need to complete for the physical. I dragged a weight behind me (traversing a wide ditch so down then up), climbed stairs while wearing a pack, and used a sledge hammer on a tire. He wanted me to do 3 sets but I didn't have it in me. I did most of 2; the weather here got really awful so I stopped early so I could get a jump on it but I did get in 100 sledge hammer wacks; 50 with each hand on lead. The stairs were really getting to me, I got a little dizzy and my eyesight got a little spotty. The pack is what makes that so difficult. I had to sit and take a breather. I could definitley tell my endurance was what was holding me back from the 3 sets (other than the weather of course). I'm going to jog tonight (weather permitting) to keep working at getting my wind up.

What's especially good about the stair training at the station I was doing last night is the pack is heavier than what we wear for the physical and the flight of stairs is a bit longer than what's on the course. If I train over the bare minimum (what's on the course) then when I get there it'll be a breeze!

He intorduced me to some of the people that were working shift with him and said I could come anytime during C or A shift and everybody was really nice and supportive! They also told me that if I get on I'll get a free gym membership. I'm so glad they told me that before we signed up for a contract! Knowing this we're going to look for a pay-by-month option. I know they're a little pricier in than signing up for a membership in the long run, but hopefully that plan will be temporary.

I'm a little sore today; not as sore as I was hoping I'd be so I feel like I didn't work hard enough. My calves and shoulders are pretty sore and my thighs and shoulders are just a little sore. Of course, it not uncommon for me to not get really sore from a workout until later in the afternoon the next day rather than then next morning...

Also look at my little seedlings I've been sprouting indoor!
pic!Collapse )

Mar. 9th, 2011

Well, I wasn't really too concerned with deer-proofing the garden. I know we have deer in our area but there's a property fence so I thought we'd be good. Nope! Saw two in the back yard yesterday morning. :) I'm thinking of building a sort of "dome" or "cage" out of chicken wire to go over the garden beds. I don't mind the deer in the yard otherwise, I just don't want them eating the garden.

I start going to my cousin's station today so he can help me train. I'll probably go about 2-3 times a week and Panda and I are going to look around at a few gyms this weekend and see if we can find one we like and can afford. I feel like I've lost a little weight, (though not gained any muscle) but I haven't measured in a few weeks. I've been reading a little bit on weight training and bodybuilding sites to try and amp myself up a little. I've been feeling a little depressed lately and I hope this can pull me out of it.

Edit: As I was looking around on LJ, an icon of Star Sapphire caught my eye. I haven't thought about costuming in awhile (not since about a year ago when I was thinking about it obsessively). I'm going to approach this weight training from all angles: it'll get me in shape for my job, it'll get me in shape for swimsuit season, I'll feel better, and I do want to start thinking about costuming again. This will get me in a position to think about all sorts of costumes I never would have considered before. We, once again, can't afford D*Con this year... but maybe next year! Plus we are going to start paying attention to the small con circuit and see what's going on there. :)

I've got 3 of my Iron Artist pieces done, and 2 near done. I'll upload them all at the same time. I really liked working on Aricana's partly because she looks really similar to one of my own characters so of course, I was partial to the design. :D I had been working on a personal piece with my char and accidently lifted the pose I had been working on for Aricana's char. opps! I just liked it. :3 It's a cleaned up full body sketch but I might throw some color on it at some point in the future. I've got 2 I did in chalk pastel, one's done and one's almost done. They look good... but I chose a paper too textured for the size I'm working in so a lot of detail was lost and/or impossible to even place. Learning experience! I didn't quite get these done as quickly as I wanted but I'll be done by my 2 week mark and just in time to open up the next slots.


I'm feeling better. I was angry at myself, sad, and truth be told, I'm still kind of depressed over the whole thing but I'll just have to work harder. We're looking into getting a gym membership, I know a few of the stations with work with my training by allowing me to come by and practice, but for now I'm going to work on my endurance. Strength is very important but while I failed due to not being strong enough, most people were failing sue to endurance. I'll work on them both of course, but I need to get my breath up.

We went out last night for Panda's birthday. Moon River for dinner (had a veggie burger which was the best veggie burger I've ever had out and some sweet potato fries) and The Distillery for drinks. I was dd so I had the sampler early in the evening. I love Moon River's beer! My mom and dad got him Marvel vs. Capcom 3 and I bought him a new XBox gold subscription. He then accidentally bought me one. >:( I'm going to call them and see if we can dispute it tomorrow but I doubt they'll allow it.

I've had to talk to him again about helping me clean. Especially now that we're in a much larger space I really need his help. He gets home around 12 on Fridays and it's pretty common for him to not have even unloaded the dishwasher for me even with half the day off. He seems to have taken it to heart as he's getting the kitchen for me now.

We did get the garden beds constructed this weekend and the blueberry and raspberry bushes down. We didn't buy enough soil for both beds but I got one filled, fertilized, and have it seeded with green onion, cabbage, lettuce, peppers, jalapenos, tomatoes, zucchini, and yellow squash plus 2 strawberry plants. I'm so excited about the garden! On top of all the variety I've got, the spot gets nearly non-stop sun all day so I really think it's going to do really, really well! We've also had our family friends (the ones with the chickens) ask if we'd like to get some biddies from them! I have always wanted to have chickens and would LOVE to get some! We have to make sure that we can build a coop large, safe, cool/warm enough before we can agree to take any. Especially since we're near some woods I want to make sure they'll be safe from snakes and hawks. If we're able to get a coop ready we'll probably get about 4-5 little hens! So cute! :3

garden pics...Collapse )
Not only did I fail the physical, I preformed more poorly than anyone else who took it.

My cousin spoke of the test in a "hey whatever, it's easy, you got this," kind of tone. Of course, it's not his fault I failed by any means, in fact I think he was tying to keep me from freaking out over it, but if I had really understood how difficult this was going to be, I wouldn't have even bothered attempting it today. I would have trained harder and exclusively for this rather than just bumping up my exercise routine with some silly 10 pound weights.

The first station was the hose drag. I had to pull three 50 foot hoses weighing in at about 35-40 pounds each; plus couplings, so I've got about 140 feet of surface area to pull against plus the weight itself. I barely passed this. Seriously, there may as well have been an elephant tied to the other end. I knew, the moment I started and first tried hoisting those hoses, that I was going to fail. (Dont confuse that with "gave up quickly"; I fell on my ass about 3 times just to complete it and twice more while trying to attempt the stretcher lift) By the time I was done, my legs were so rubbery and worthless I could barely stand let alone left a 80 lb stretcher with 180lbs on it, complete a keiser sled, drag an 180lb dead weighted dummy, complete 10 up and down cycle of a flight of stairs with a 45lb pack, pull a 100lb weight by rope hand over hand (with pack), climb 5 flights of stairs with pack and rolled up hose, open and close a fire hydrant, and roll three 50ft hoses all within 18 minutes.

There were only 3 females there and we all failed. I much harder than them. There were three other fails besides us as far as I know. I was able to walk through the rest of the course and try out each station to see how they feel. I can't believe I thought I could do this today.

So much was riding on the line today, and what made everything even worse was having to tell my husband, my family, friends, and classmates that I had failed. Not only failed, but I was at the bottom of the bottom on something really important.

I have cried about it so much today that my eyes are swollen. I haven't felt like this much of a depressed, angry, worthless, sad, and weepy ball of negativity in a very long time. I'm very sore, I'm going to be even more sore over the next few days. My neck, back, and arms are killing me, my legs will kill me tomorrow, I've got what feels like a bruise waiting to bloom on my right shoulder from the hose, and I'm sure I'll wonder why "insert-body-part-here" hurts tomorrow too.

When I can tow my Corolla down the street with a bit of rope and my work boots, backwards and with the parking break on,  then I'm getting somewhat to close to ready to attempt this again.
okay I'm officially banned from the garden center. >_> Got more seeds: romaine lettuce, some other kind of lettuce, cabbage, green beans, green onions, and 2 small strawberry plants. Still need herbs though....D: I'll wait. I'll force myself to wait until I've got this stuff down and I'll just buy plants instead of seeds.

Got a yard and my optimism shot through the roof.

Tags:

I has a happy!

I got a call from Southside! :DDD I was lucky enough to have gone on lunch a half an hour early and caught the phone call! She asked if I was still interested in the job to which my brain said "PPPPPFFTTT WARGARBLE YEEEES" but I made my mouth say "Yes, of course! I'm so pleased to hear from you!"

I have a physical Friday at 9am (I will have food poisoning ::winkwink::) and a written Tuesday at 9am (I will have a plumbing emergency and will be late to work ::winkwink::).

The weekend physical and written tests are few and far between. Since my boss just told me today that she's going to sell her house so she'll be in a better position to walk out because "things are that bad here" between her and her boss, I'd say this came at perfect timing.

(btw when I asked her where she was going to live she started crying and said "I DON'T KNOW I'LL FIGURE IT OUT" then left for 2 hours) :/